i should be sleeping now, so i'm going to make this quick...this morning i went to see jane, the couselor...i only talked to her for about a half hour and she told me that i need to see a psychotherapist because i don't want to take any drugs...so i have to do some research and find some names to have her refer me to someone...tonight at work wasn't too bad...i'm getting lots of overtime...i'll have just fourteen hours from this week...hopefully i'll get to work some next week too...since i've been on this new station, g. has walked by every night and just said hi to me...well, tonight george was standing at my station talking to me and he said "oh my god, look at this."...i looked up and g. was standing in front of my station...he handed george a dollar and then said hi to me and walked away...george looked at me with this shit-eating grin on his face and said "that was an unnecessary trip. he knows i don't care about a dollar." i was so nervous when i saw him that i was shaking and my face turned red...i was fine the whole day up until that point, then i started thinking about him and he was stuck in my head the rest of the night...i cut again today...this afternoon...i wasn't sad or depressed...actually i was more like numb...and almost excited...it was weird...bed time for me...<3