tonite was bowling...my team versus g.'s team...it was definetly interesting...i wore a pair of tight jeans and a very, very low cut blouse...i had him completly distracted...he didn't make his average one time tonight...but his teammates picked up his slack...and we lost three games...but i had fun watching g. fidget...that was my main goal...and i feel i succeeded...other than that today was uneventful...i woke up at noon, which was really early for me, and cleaned the inside of my car...then i chilled online for a while...but one thing does stand out from everything else...i cut today...it was the first time in months...but for some reason i just had this burning desire to feel the knife against my skin...i only made three small cuts...just enough to bleed...but it doesn't feel like it was enough and i still hunger for the blade...but on a happier note...i made an appointment to see a dermatologist on the 21st...hopefully he will let me take accutane again...the last time i took it was when i was 16 and it worked great...my acne isn't bad now...but my face is still really oily, especially at work, and i want it to not be shiny anymore...i think i'm going to call and make an appointment to see a shrink sometime this week...before i get any worse...bed time for me...i have to call my gyno early in the morning to get them to call the pharmacy to prescribe my birth control since the pharmacy lost my prescription...argh...good nite <3