ok...so i'll elaborate on yesterday's short entry...things seem to be looking up...i told rachel that "baby steps" are good, and much better than no steps...i had bowling last night...g. came in and i acted like i didn't even notice him...then he was playing with george's son and i took that as an opportunity to give him an invitation to my birthday party...when i gave it to him, we joked around for a couple minutes, then i walked away, acting unphased by being so close to him...really, my heart was jumping out of my chest...then i noticed that he was watching me when i was flirting with willie's brothers and his teammates...so i started flirting a little harder...when i went up to bowl, i looked behind me and could see him blushing and trying not to smile while all of his friends were talking and looking at me...i just acted like i didn't see it once again, even though it made me ten times more nervous than i already was...then the most amazing thing happened...it was like a light from heaven appeared around him...seriously...i was leaning over the computer waiting for a guy from the opposing team to total our scores...i looked up and g. was looking dead at me with a small smile on his face...we held eye contact and i smile back at him...then the really smiled! teeth and all...i know i sound like a complete idiot...but you have to understand...this guy DOES NOT SMILE!! at all...he totally made my night...i was so freaking happy...so, i took this as my cue to try to chat with him...i walked over and crouched beside his chair...i was telling him that i saw his friend on saturday...g. was acting really interested...then his friend harold came up behind me and pulled on my shoulders and i fell over...g. thought it was hysterical obviously...he had just inhaled his cigarette and then he blew the smoke into my face because he was laughing so hard...his face turned all red...yeah, it was pretty funny...and it kind of broke the ice...hopefully tonight when i go to work i'll see him and we'll get to talk...i need to go get ready and do the dishes before i leave...<3